Sacrifices
by Waterdancer
Summary: Will’s post-ATY decisions affects his future and everyone that he loves. Alternate Universe, character death.**Chapter 2 added**
1. Chapter 1

Title: "Sacrifices"  
  
Author: Waterdancer aka AquarianLady  
  
Email: jch114@hotmail.com  
  
Website: none at this time.  
  
Feedback: YES! Flames will be ignored. 

  
Distribution: CD ALL DAY. Anyone else please ask.   
  
Disclaimer: Anything Alias related are all the property of ABC and Touchstone Pictures. It is the creation of JJ Abrams and Bad Robot Productions.  
  
Summary: Will's post-ATY decisions affect his future and everyone that he loves.-Character death.

  
Rating: PG for right now. Will go from PG-13 to R  
  
Classification: Alternate Universe. 

  
A/N: Thank you to Robin, and Thorne for the beta. All italicized words are his thoughts and flashbacks. Enjoy! 

__

******

"You know what?" Francie asked, laying her head on Will's chest. 

"Hmm?" he mumbled with his eyes partially shut. 

"I love you. I do. I've never loved anyone more, Will."

"I love you too, Francie," he looked down at her. "Truly and totally love you."

She sat up on the bed and started to twist her wedding ring around her finger. 

"Will? I have something to tell you." She looked over at him, lines creasing her forehead as she bit her lip. 

"What's wrong?" he asked, sitting up

She looked down at her hands and stated, "I'm pregnant."

"What?" he asked, sitting up.

"I'm pregnant," she repeated, still looking down at her hands. 

He reached over and pulled her back to him. "That's amazing," he said smiling.

"Really? I didn't think you'd be happy about it. I mean we just were married two years ago, and already there's a baby," she sighed. "I just didn't think that this is what you wanted right now."

His eyes widened in shock. How could she ever think that he didn't love her, that he didn't want a family? "Fran, you are my wife, and I love you. Pregnant or not, that isn't going to change. Ever."

"You mean that?" she asked, her voice shaking with emotion.

"I do," he replied, rubbing her cheek.

"We're having a baby, Will," she said as tears fell down her face.

"Yeah, we are," he replied. Then, he kissed her to show how much he cared. 

***

Will blinked his eyes hard to try to stop the tears from coming. He pulled his overcoat around him tighter. _I have to be strong for Kayla_. He looked over at his daughter who was asleep in his sister's arms. 

"Francine Denise Tippin was a devoted wife and daughter, a beloved mother, and a cherished friend."

__

"Will you marry me?" Will asked sliding a velvet-covered box across the table.

Francie stared at him. "You aren't serious, are you?"

"I am." He nodded slowly. Don't say no. Please, don't say no.

"I love you, Francie. The time we've spent together over this past year has been the best in my life. I don't want it to end. I want you there every morning when I wake up. I want you there all the time. I just love you, Fran. I—"

"Will?" she held her hand up and the diamond ring was shining brightly. "Yes, I'll marry you."

"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust," the priest continued. 

"Will," Amy whispered, "your hand." She motioned down to the white rose he was holding. _Her favorite. _His grip had gotten so tight on the flower that the thorns pricked his skin. He hadn't even noticed it.

He took out his handkerchief and wrapped his hand. He walked and placed the rose on top of the closed casket. "I love you," he whispered as he wiped tears from his eye.

"Thanks," he mumbled to Amy. She nodded at him sadly and rubbed his cheek. "Will, it's going to be okay."

He knows that's a lie, the kind of lie everyone says to the mourning. "I know. Thank you for helping me with her." He rubbed his daughter's back as she slept soundly on her shoulder. 

"You're welcome." A cold shudder ran through his body as he watched the casket be lowered into the ground. _It's supposed to be me in there. Dammit, Francie, why did you come home early?_

****

"Do you want something to eat, Will?" Amy asked as she handed him a plate. 

Will took his eyes off of Kayla who was sitting in her playpen. "Thanks, Amy, but I'm not hungry." He turned back to watch her, afraid that if he blinked she'd be gone just like her mother.

"When's the last time that you've eaten? Or gotten any sleep?" Amy studied him, and he knew what she was seeing. She saw the dullness in his eyes and how he was continually twisting the wedding band around his finger. He knew she was worried about the fact he had barely shown any emotion during the burial. .

"This morning and last night." 

"A bagel and coffee isn't eating, Will. Sleeping for 30 minutes and pacing all night isn't sleep," Amy sighed patting his knee.

"What do you think I should do?" he said, his voice showing the stress of the past week.

"All I'm saying is that you aren't doing Kayla any good by not taking care of yourself," she said evenly, standing up, pulling him up with her. 

"Go get some sleep." She pushed him towards his bedroom. "No argument."

He smiled weakly, "You're starting to sound just like mom. Thanks, Amy."

"You're welcome." She pushed him again. "Now go."

***

Will walked down the darkened hall to the bedroom that he and Francie had shared. He stopped at the closed door before opening it. As he walked over to the bed and sat down, the faint smell of jade assaulted his senses, and tears came to his eyes. 

__

"Do you like it?" he asked, standing behind her, with one hand on her waist and smelling her hair.

"I love it, Will. How did you know that I would like this?" she asked as she put a drop of the jade scented oil on her neck. "Thank you."

He said a silent thank you that night. Francie had seemed to forget about their argument a few days earlier, about the frequency of his trips. She missed him and so had his daughter.

"I'm going to tell Devlin that I'm done," he had thought that night. Francie and Kayla were more important to him.

That had been a month ago_. _

Will laid down on the bed and whispered, "I'm sorry, Francie. So damn sorry."


	2. Chapter 2

Title: "Sacrifices"  
  
Author: Waterdancer aka AquarianLady  
  
Email: jch114@hotmail.com  
  
Website: none at this time.  
  
Feedback: YES! Flames will be ignored. 

Distribution: CD ALL DAY. Anyone else please ask.   
  
Disclaimer: Anything Alias related are all the property of ABC and Touchstone Pictures. It is the creation of JJ Abrams and Bad Robot Productions.  
  
Summary: Will's post-ATY decisions affect his future and everyone that he loves.-Character death.

Rating: PG for right now. Will go from PG-13 to R  
  
Classification: Alternate Universe. 

A/N: Thank you to Robin, and Thorne for the beta. All italicized words are his thoughts and flashbacks. Enjoy! 

From across the room, Sydney watched Will toss and turn in his sleep.  His face was contorted as if he were in pain.  Amy had told her that he had been having a hard time sleeping, and she understood that pain.  She had done the same thing after they murdered Danny. She rubbed her forehead, and turned back to her book.

"How long do you plan to sit there?" he said, startling her from her reading. He stretched and rolled over.

"I didn't know that you were awake," she replied, closing her book. "How are you?"

"As well as can be expected," he replied, sitting up, his voice sounding tired. "What are you doing here?"

Amy's calls had become more and more concerned as the days passed.  She had made her first call to Sydney hours after the funeral, and she had continued to call as she watched her brother fall apart in front of her eyes.

"Well, Amy called me and said that you may want to talk," she said as she put her book on the floor.

"She shouldn't have done that. I'm fine, Sydney.  Really, " he responded, smiling weakly.  It was a familiar refrain between them.  It had been ever since she had seen him in Taipei in a blood soaked sweatshirt.  How many times had he lied to her, told her that he was fine, when he was obviously not?  She couldn't remember.  "What time is it?"

Looking down at her watch, she replied, "It's 8:00." She saw him look towards the windows and notice the darkness.  Saw him realize that it was night.

"Where's Kayla?"

"She's with Amy.  She told me to let you know that she's going to keep her for a few days, and for you to get some rest. I've got us some dinner downstairs, "she said, looking to him, hoping for some sort of response. There was nothing.

"Will?" 

"I'll be down in a minute." 

***

Sydney was taking out plates for dinner when Will came down to the kitchen.  "Sydney, I can get that," he said as she reached into the cabinet. "You really don't have to go through all of this trouble for me. You go have a seat at the table." He reached over her head and started to pull out a glass.

"Will, stop it," she said. "I think I'm capable of taking out dishes." She placed the plate down on the counter.  "Go take a seat, please.  I'm taking care of you for once."   

He looked at her as if he wanted to protest more, but instead he simply said, "Thank you, Sydney."  She looked in his eyes, and realized what Amy had said was true. That light that was once there when he was around Francie was gone; dull, unblinking eyes that were devoid of any emotion had replaced them. Her voice cracked, and she could feel the tears starting to form in her eyes. "You're welcome, Will."  He walked out of the kitchen.

She carried everything out to the table, only to find him gone.  "Will?" She placed the glasses down on the table.  

"I'm in here," he called out from the living room.  She found him sitting on the floor in front of the couch, wine glass in one hand, and flipping through a photo album with the other.

"I shouldn't have left that out, Will. I'm sorry," she said as she sat down on the couch.

"No, it's okay.  I haven't looked through these in a few months."  His voice was lifeless as he continued to mechanically turned the pages.  "Do you ever regret what we do, Sydney?" 

"Sometimes," she replied, unsure of where this line of questioning was heading.

  
"Francie always asked me if I regretted anything in my life. 'Never' was always my response.  That wasn't necessarily true. I regretted lying to her before and after we were married, and I regret finding out the truth about you," he revealed before taking another sip from his glass.

She knew the pain that she felt was twisting her face. She could understand what he was feeling, but to hear his feelings said with such calmness, and certainty made her catch her breath. "Wh—What do you mean?"

He looked up at her from his position on the floor, and continued, "Sydney, when I say that, I don't mean to hurt you. I mean that if I hadn't found out about you, Fran and I would have never fallen in love, gotten married, and she'd still be alive."

"Will, it's not your fault that this happened. You should know that," Sydney said patting his shoulder. She didn't bother to correct him about his marriage.  It was obvious to her that her two friends had been meant for one another.  They would have married, but if Will had not been sucked into Sydney's world, Francie would still be alive today.  Sydney couldn't deny that truth.

"But I don't, Syd. I really don't.  There were so many times that I wanted to tell her the truth—tell her the truth about me, you, Vaughn, and why I go on so many trips for the newspaper when I'm just a 'feature' writer. Of course, I didn't tell her the truth because in my stupidity, I thought it would keep her and Kayla safe. _The not knowing. That was supposed to keep them safe. 'Ignorance is bliss,' " he sighed.  He stopped at their wedding picture.  He traced the outline of her face in the picture as he took another sip of wine.  "She was so beautiful that day," he whispered.  He went to another picture--a picture of Francie and Kayla.  "Do you see that pendant?" he asked, pointed to a solitary diamond hanging around Francie's neck._

She nodded slowly, biting her lip. Seeing her friend smiling back at her from the pictures was tearing at her.  Francie was beautiful, always had been, but the joy she had experienced after her marriage, after having her daughter, had made her glow with a beauty that Sydney had never seen before.

"It was my mom's.  She wanted to give it to the mother of my first child, like my grandmother did for her when I was born.  She gave it to Francie two weeks before Kayla was born." His voice cracked with pain as he again traced the outline of her face. "I knew that whatever I did or said half a world away, when I came home, there was Francie and Kayla. That normalcy.  When I was home, I was just Will, husband to a wonderful woman and father to a beautiful daughter.  As long as I had them here, I knew that what I—we were doing was okay. Does that make any sense?" he asked, looking over at her, looking for her to confirm his thoughts. 

She couldn't tell him how much she had wished that she had that same normalcy that he had attained with Francie.  Not now.  "It does, Will.  You should know that I think—no, I know Francie would have married you regardless of what was going on.  She loves you," she said, her own voice catching. "She loved you."

Will looked down in his glass.  "I know she did," he replied.  "I love her so damn much."  He rubbed the bridge of his nose. "You came here to look in on me, and how do I repay you?" He stood up from the couch, and held his hand out to her. "Let's eat."  

***

"Are you sure you don't want to talk any more?" Sydney asked as Will walked her to the door.  "I could stay longer."

"You've done plenty, really," he said, sighing. "I know that I've said it enough, but thank you."

She turned and hugged him. "I miss her, too, Will."

"I know you do, Syd. I know," he mumbled into her neck.  

She turned to leave but then stopped mid-stride and looked over her shoulder.  She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath.  "Remember that Vaughn needs you to come in for debriefing later this week."

She saw the understanding in his eyes, and the anger.  The CIA didn't allow anyone time to grieve.  As Vaughn once said to her, they prefer you to be emotionless, even in grief.  "I'll be there," he replied, closing the door.


End file.
